johnmdemarco posted on May 26, 2010 20:42
Today at work I found myself in a couple of different situations in which I asked leaders wrestling with mixed results from their teams, “How do you truly know when you’ve gotten commitment?”
On one occasion, there was an awkward silence. Then, a few different responses were shared, before one senior leader finally weighed in, “When I see behavioral change.”
She was exactly right, in the sense that behavioral change is the end result of true commitment. However, the challenge is learning how to discern if commitment has been given up front, before the behaviors have the opportunity to manifest themselves.
What do you listen for in words; study in facial expressions and body language; feel with your gut; and so forth, that helps give you a barometer for when someone is fully bought into the goal and willing to do what it takes for the team or endeavor to be successful?
On a personal level, beyond work situations, there are many pieces of evidence to determine whether someone is committed to you. Taking it even deeper, there are fewer straight-forward signposts that point you toward fully discerning your own level of commitment.
“How do I truly know when I’ve given commitment?” is a question worth asking during quiet, reflective moments or at the nexus of stress, anxiety and ambition. What are the vehicles of momentum that seem to be at hand for fully pursuing a goal or dream, and what are the real or imagined hindrances?
The most difficult and disciplined work is being willing to rigorously examine and knock down up front the potential barriers to persevering in your commitments. It can be draining, disappointing and career-limiting to get caught up in excuses or explanations later on when you fall short of your goal because your commitment was too haphazard or not fully thought through. Perhaps it was someone else’s commitment, and you simply latched on with the best of intentions. Maybe you didn’t fully know what it was you were committing to.
Some good questions to ask right now: “What am I committed to, and why?” And, “What are the factors working in favor of my commitment, as well as those that could possibly undermine this commitment?
The same demands of commitment we make of others we must first make of ourselves, and that will help to give us a more realistic—and possibly compassionate—lens through which to lead and call others to embrace a vision for accomplishing something greater than just their immediate self interests.